So many magic cards

Take an amount that allows me to live luxuriously (I don't need billions for that), then spend the rest on supporting WWF.

That's a good idea! Err, not the reverse harem bit, although do look me up if you're "short on staff," no pun intended. I think a good thing to do would be to establish a world government comprised of representatives from all national entities, including those of dubious recognition such as indigenous First Nations, Palestine, Taiwan, and Kosovo, heck, even self-declared micronations if they insist. It could be kind of like the United Nations, except it would actually have authority on international matters instead of being largely impotent. Each nation (or comparable entity) would make decisions through a combination of two avenues: elected representatives and referendums. The latter so that the people can have their voice directly, and the former so that there is input from people who know what they're talking about. That was a big problem with Brexit - average citizens didn't really understand the scope and implications of what they were saying yes or no to. But elected representatives alone create problems such as partisanship and broken systems which allow situations like that in the United States - I'm not here to bash Trump, I'm just saying something isn't working when a politician with only one (serious) opponent can win and represent people while being voted for by less than half of voters. I think what the world needs is a system which combines the two, and also acts as a public forum to allow average citizens to speak out directly about their wishes and their difficulties. Of course, to get everyone, especially the more greedy or dictatorial governments to agree, it might be necessary to make myself a benevolent dictator by threatening some into compliance with an unparalleled nuclear arsenal, or better yet, an antimatter bomb of some sort. Only for that one purpose, and only as a "speak softly and carry a big stick" thing, of course.

I'd personally take care of my family first, pay for any and all treatments or expenses they have. Then I'd take care of myself by moving into a nice house and get any need items like furniture, food, tv, internet, a phone, my own ps4, every game I want when it comes out, a's well as any and all sexual toys and items that I want so I can please myself. I know, pretty selfish of me, but I'd only do all of that once I've taken care of the world first. That way I won't hate humanity as much as I do now.

Bribe the North Koreans into giving me access to their missile silos and then send them all at a random open field so that when the ISS or another satellite sees it from space it spells out "Send Dick Pics" just to mess with people

Probably gain weight because I can suddenly afford buying snacks and sweets.

First is buying my mom a nice house and everything. She's never experienced the whole wealthy person life so I'd like to give her that. Aside from helping my other relatives like brothers and such. I would pay Tesla to make me a custom supercar; I would buy my old childhood house back and get every console and video game I can find, plus a bomb ass PC. Next is buying protein stuff and equipment so I can exercise at home. I'd have my girlfriend move in with me, and my best friend as well, lots of pot for him too, he's a fan. Next is kids! I want to marry my girlfriend and impregnate her as much as possible, lots of babies. I would become a collector of many things, now that I have the time and money to support it. I just love collecting shit, memorabilia from artists and game merch, next is expanding my rock collection (It's just cool rocks I find and then smooth down by hand.). Next is meeting famous people, like Dan from game grumps and Betty White (She's my favorite old lady excluding family members), people like that. Next is traveling. I want to visit Japan, Ireland, England, and some other countries. Finally I would give NASA just a shit ton of money, they're incredibly underfunded and honestly there's only so much we could do on earth, personally I believe looking to space is a good idea, inhabiting mars or the moon, possibly Venus but Venus kinda sucks.

Buy myself some feelings.

You're outta luck there, best aim for finding a romantic partner.

Haha
That's the issue
My ability to enrage everyone basically hinders social interaction

Id buy out YouTube and fix their ad policies and copyright policies so they can stop fucking my favorite creators in the asshole.

I'd probably just simply donate all that money to charity and help out all the starving people in the world

First i would use some of that money to sate my mom's desire to travel the world, then follow the same desire and do the same for myself, but instead of the world it would be my state, followed the northern part of my country (which is where i live) so i can understand the pains of our people and see it first hand.

Second i would use that money to become an economic powerhouse in my state, because if neither our government or our industry won't do anything for us, then someone will have to.

Third i'd get myself a proper gaming rig, because i must keep some level selfishness.

That's very thoughtful of you

I guess it is time for me to start playing TF2