As the name suggests, I want to know about your naughty Christmas time stories I’ll go first

I was once outside a bar and I was so horny. I was jerking off in the car beating my dick to the Christmas music. I have no idea why I just seem like a good idea at the time I was pretty hammered.
I was startled when I heard a knock on the window and looked up to see a cop and I’ll be honest with you. He was beautiful and I came right back in there took me a couple of minutes when I finally roll down the window. He said sir, I’m gonna let you off with a warning please do the stuff at home.

He said merry Christmas, and as he was walking back to his car, my cock Came back to life, and rather than get arrested I called the cab went home and fucked myself silly with my dildo

One Christmas, I opened my present the night before... Very naughty of me

THE IMAGE IN MY MIND OF SOMEONE BEATING IT TO "its beginning to look a lot like christmas!" IS SO FUNNY TO ME IDK WHY

Congratulations you committed a fucking crime and just admitted to jerking off in public where children are outside. Congratulations on narrowly missing being added to the sex offender registry you fucking weirdo

A couple years back my parents were going shopping and wanted me to bring some outdoor Christmas decorations to the garage so they wouldn't be damaged by a storm that was going to pass through later. I said I'd do it, and instantly forgot.

A few hours later I was in the shower when the rain started to come down hard. That's when I finally remembered. See those weren't just any ornaments. They were passed down by generations of my mom's family.

I grabbed a robe and my shoes, then ran out there to try and save them. The storm was BAD, but the good news was that I manged to get them all in the garage before they suffered any major damages. The bad news was that my robe was blowing open the whole time, even when a car passed by. I got a honk for my show. :I

pretty sure its still illegal

This bar is located in the middle of bum Fuck nowhere outside of my town about 10 miles give or take. It’s not on any map it’s more like a secret hang out for certain club members and occasionally we do get a cop out there every once in a while looking for people that are too stupid trying to drive home while under the influence

You can say it’s illegal all you want but I’m pretty sure we’ve all done things that were illegal at one point. Besides, I was in the backseat of my car beating my meat I thought for certain no one could see me I was wrong.

I only go there when I want to have a good time to forget about my horrible life about my shitty ass job and get fucking drunk, stoned, and probably fucked So my only question to the rest of you dumbasses is if I’m looking to get drunk, stoned and fucked why would I go to a bar that has children hanging around? Do you know how fucked up that sounds?

Jesus Christ what happened to this thread!?

I never did clarify when I said you’re naughty Christmas time incidents or accidents which ever you wanna call them I want to know like what was the most craziest fucked up thing you ever did what was the most stupidest thing you ever did like did you get into a fight? Did you get fucked by a Santa Claus did you? I’m not asking about oh I snuck down 1 Christmas eve opened up all my presents early. I’m not talking about that.

I made out with a Christmas tree at a company party, almost losing my job.

This coworker came in this low-cut sweater dress, wrapped in garland & lights, with Angel atop of her head; she was a Christmas tree. Boss allowed us to drink, as he was very laidback on the parties and nobody got out of hand. So after a few, I find myself making out with this woman, who just so happens to be my supervisor’s wife. And he sees it. Written up, reprimanded, it sucked.

I have been known to stand under a mistletoe or two when it is the season. Nothing specific that I've ever done, though. Rather boring in terms of that. I have told my wife Christmas themed pick-up lines to see if we can make one of these cold snowy nights a bit hot and steamy. No luck yet, but I have plenty of time until winter is over and the holiday highs end. And I hope to see some actual snow soon as well. I wanna hit my neighbor with a snowball.

I was exploring an abandoned house Christmas 2018 and decided to trash the place because it had been abandoned for several years anyway.
Smashed out the windows, broke the furniture and did as much damage as I could, like a big wreck room.

Christ, relax y'all. Public stuff isn't new, and being right outside a bar it's not as though children were around. Legit worst thing that coulda happened was op getting arrested, lucky enough got off with a warning.

If I knew it was gonna be like this I never would’ve said anything Christ