Today has been not great for me y'know. Tonight especially. Like it feels like I'm blocked from the world sometimes. Like I'm not allowed to just be happy, it has to come from me working and it's only a high for a moment. Sometimes that moment is longer, but that just means greater the fall. Whatever, guess I have to keep on trying.
Instead of doing anything today I just thought a lot and like, sometimes I feel like I'm in my dark timeline version self where I've just failed, where I'm unlovable, all that. It's only been a couple days since that last comment that's crazy. Movies have been getting into my head too much, need to look at cute anime girls more and get stuff out of my head.
My life has been so wacky and stressful recently, like I got sick from stress and stuff, and then a couple days ago I just had a slight mental roadblock so massive I just stopped thinking about it, and I'm just so unprepared for everything, but I always move. I was just sitting in bed, and I have some love and care in my life, truly, but god I just reminded myself how cute girls in glasses are and like had to binge and it makes no sense but coming to the end of the year I've just realized nothing ever will I think. Goodnight, and happy holidays. I wish you all get the presents you want. Mine is a myth.
It’s been a minute since I’ve done a comment here because I’ve never felt too lonely aside from the weekend I did, but tonight I’m tired yet awake and unable. It’s strange. I just like watching people pointlessly talk on here. It’s charming, it reminds me of far stranger days. Not exciting or nostalgic ones, just stranger times. I know I’m a mild porn addict but it’s only gotten more evident and part of my core personality recently and while it’s freeing in some ways it’s also just discouraging to the idea I’ll ever feel fulfilled and happy in a perfect way. No more searching though, which is a good thing. One avenue of fulfillment. Sorry if this is vague and depressing. Just wish anyone reading a beautiful night. I like having this comment section all to myself sometimes… sometimes.
Posted on 2023-11-13 03:26:13 Score: 1 (vote Up) ( Report comment )
Tonight especially. Like it feels like I'm blocked from the world sometimes. Like I'm not allowed to just be happy, it has to come from me working and it's only a high for a moment. Sometimes that moment is longer, but that just means greater the fall.
Whatever, guess I have to keep on trying.
Posted on 2023-11-16 04:07:02 Score: 1 (vote Up) ( Report comment )
It's only been a couple days since that last comment that's crazy. Movies have been getting into my head too much, need to look at cute anime girls more and get stuff out of my head.
Posted on 2023-12-22 07:52:41 Score: 0 (vote Up) ( Report comment )
I was just sitting in bed, and I have some love and care in my life, truly, but god I just reminded myself how cute girls in glasses are and like had to binge and it makes no sense but coming to the end of the year I've just realized nothing ever will I think.
Goodnight, and happy holidays.
I wish you all get the presents you want.
Mine is a myth.
Posted on 2024-02-08 10:15:32 Score: 1 (vote Up) ( Report comment )
I know I’m a mild porn addict but it’s only gotten more evident and part of my core personality recently and while it’s freeing in some ways it’s also just discouraging to the idea I’ll ever feel fulfilled and happy in a perfect way. No more searching though, which is a good thing. One avenue of fulfillment.
Sorry if this is vague and depressing. Just wish anyone reading a beautiful night. I like having this comment section all to myself sometimes… sometimes.
Posted on 2024-02-08 10:19:18 Score: 2 (vote Up) ( Report comment )
Posted on 2024-02-12 04:07:12 Score: 0 (vote Up) ( Report comment )