Maybe it's just me, but I have recently run into waves and waves of submissive men. It's not a problem for me, I can switch roles very easily and sometimes I enjoy being dominant or taking the lead, however I have come across so many submissive men lately that I'm starting to wonder why. Why is this more common?

The few dominant men I know of are borderline/actually are abusive and sexist.

What the heck?

While I can't speak for other men, the reason dominant women (or more assertive to be more accurate) turn me on is that they want you and they want you now. For me, it's like I'm willing whenever you want, I'm always horny XD. It tuns me on so much giving her so much pleasure at her mercy.Being dominant is okay, but I don't see the point. She's a woman, (or a man depending on your sexuality) a person. I don't feel the need to punish her like some filthy animal, nor do I want to force her, it doesn't feel right. Besides, what is there for me to prove by acting like that?

To answer your question about abusive and sexist men, I just figure it's an inferiority complex. They don't think anyone else to be of any value and that women are just there for pleasure. Though obviously not all dominant men are like that.

My idea of a dominant person is neither 'punishing people like animals' nor forceful. I believe in full, 100% consenting relationships. I view dominance as something more along the lines of being a leader, knowing what they want, knowing how to get what they want, and keeping the other person secure. For example in a maid and master relationship, the master is often providing her money and a place to stay, entertainment, clothes, uniforms, etc. Meanwhile the maid does all of the things like cooking, cleaning, repairing or fixing things around the house, tending the garden, assisting the guests and keeping things organized/scheduled. Over all it's a balanced relationship. BDSM and the idea of master/slave or dom/sub adds sex and some more unusual quirks to that relationship, such as a skimpier uniforms and a... More exciting form of 'payback' whenever the maid does something like breaking a vase. :P

I absolutely do not like the idea of humiliation, abuse, or looking down on others. I enjoy spanking and light flogging cause it's kinda fun in an inexplicable way, but if the intent is to purposefully hurt, I would not partake.

So with that said, MY idea of a dominant man has kind of died out. Now I come across a lot of guys who don't know what they want, they prefer to be protected rather than do the protecting, they prefer to be told what to do, they prefer the housewife life style, they don't want to take initiative, and they prefer for the other person in the relationship to have that leader-like personality.

Not a fan of the dom men who think that safe words and shit don't exist. Get the fuck out of the BDSM community then, you abusive rapist.

Friggin sadists.

I'm a dominant male.

sex me lel

So... No other explanations?

They're having sex.

I don't understand...

The main reason why you won't find as many dominant males on porn sites is because they're having sex with real women (or men if they're gay) while many of the submissive ones are here having cybersex with women (or men if they're gay). Dominant males who do come to porn sites usually do so quietly and sparingly to satisfy their urges and little else.

I myself is dominant and I can't speak for dom men, because there are the ones who are abusive, sexist, and/or rapist. My opinion on being dominant is to take lead and to make sure the woman i'm with is both safe and comfortable around me both in/out of the bedroom. I believe most women like a guy to be dominant but very caring at the sametime.

I agree with Wildbeast25. There is a responsibility of both the Dominant and the submissive. The submissive is to obey and take head of the Dominant's words and actions. The Dominant is responsible for the safety, nurturing and care of the one they take under their hand. Some people just don't like responsibility of doing more than just taking advantage of a submissive's desire for dominance. Shame, but it happens. There always needs to be trust, honor and respect going down and up. Sounds sappy, but it's how I do things.

I am a dominant man. Love to have control over my partners