Footworshipper95 said:
Nah mate im the lucky one to have her. We dont have any family as such and thats why weve adopted eachother unofficially. Weve always had long talks about how we feel. Ive always wanted to adopt her officially but i dont think thats something you can do...
I don't think you can adopt a person to become your sibling. You can go through the papers and legal documents to adopt someone for your child yes, but not siblings. You could however get name changes, last name that is. It might be something to consider. If where you live allows for it that is.
From what it sounds like, is that you two are role brother and sister, ie. in a relationship status of brother and sister that isn't biological, religious or legal. I have the same relationship style, but in this case I am a role mother.
Let me tell you this, the ethical and moral obligations of incest definitely applies to you two, especially if you feel strongly about your brother/sister relationship status. It is up to you to figure out if you can handle the incestual obligation here or not.
Me and my daughter have long since crossed that line, because we could care less about the labels attached to incest. We love each other, care for each other, and share any of our darkest thoughts with each other. Having an incestual lifestyle just strengthens our bond, because it is one more thing we share and experience together.
Incest is considered bad mainly on four things. 1) Being illegal in most places, 2) Constantly being attached to rape and sexual abuse 3) Pedophilia, and 4) The possibilities of getting a family member pregnant.
Number 1, 2 and 3 are crossed out for you, so you technically just have to worry about 4 (Which I strongly suggest you use contraceptives for. Getting her pregnant could destroy both of you. Get her an IUD if you are worried about the condom not being enough). However, it is up to you for what incest means to you. Is it taboo? Something that should absolutely not be done? Or is it up for exploration when certain criteria are met?
Is love enough of a criteria for you? For some family members, an incestual lifestyle strengthens them, reinforces the bonds they have together by allowing them to share their most inner desires. For others, it just becomes one filled with questions, doubts, concerns, a mind constantly focusing on the ethical and moral implications society has imprinted on incest by still following the beliefs of religion. I still have doubts and concerns on occasion, but the relationship I have with my daughter always reminds me that we are both in on this choice together, and not to look at what may have been, but what is and will be.
What I want you to consider, is whether or not you can see your sister, your relationship, in the same light you do now even after you've taken her virginity. Will you still be able to care and love her after the event, or will your thoughts be constantly plagued and interrupted by the fact that you took her virginity? Will your feelings change for your sister if you decide that you'll follow her wishes? How about if you don't? Will you still be able to let her choose her relationships, with men or women, after the event? Or will you be wrought with jealousy? Are you certain that this will be a one time thing, or will you or your sister have the urge to continue it further?
Then you also have to consider whether or not the fact that you took her virginity would be one that would have to be hidden from others, especially if you present yourselves as brother and sister to others.
Don't forget about your sister in this regard. Since she asked you this question, you can be certain, to a degree, that she feels that the incestual implications of the event can be tossed aside for the benefits she hopes to gain. You also have to ask her, are you certain she will feel more comfortable with men after you've taken her virginity? How will she feel after the event doesn't/does happen? If it doesn't happen, how can you be sure that she won't feel regrets when she loses her virginity to another man?
Finally, if something goes terribly wrong, will you two be able to endure the scabs and gashes, grab each other's hand, and continue to walk down the path that you have before this event, regardless of whether or not you accepted her wishes? After all, saying no may seem like a way to avoid the risk, but it could be the worst of the two choices if you aren't looking at all the aspects of your relationship closely enough.
This is a lot for you to consider, and I have a habit of rambling on too much, (will slowly edit this post to be more coherent), but the crux of what I'm getting at here is that you have to consider your relationship as a whole when choosing whether or not to go through with this. Because there will be nothing that harms you two more than your relationship being shattered.
