I’ll be honest with you I’ve never really had a workplace incident until three days ago and for the record I am seriously questioning my boss and his way to raise a child

So we were trying to sell some furniture like couches and everything and there was this loveseat and my bosses daughter Samantha was sitting on that couch she’s like 12 and she was talking with a client who wanted to buy the couch doesn’t sound so bad right until I caught this copper smell, and I could not figure out where it was coming from

And when she in the client got up to go and process the paperwork, I noticed on one of the cushions she had bled all over …… I wish I was lying about that. Apparently no one in her family told her about going through puberty, and when my boss told me to get rid of the couch, I said you do it yourself. I’m not touching that he’s been blowing up my phone since 8 PM.

People I need a stiff drink and I think I’m gonna go and take another shower. I feel dirty just typing this out.

One of my previous jobs was a Bellstaff Captain at a resort. I won't say where, but it involves a famous theme park.
Anyways...

It was me and 4 other Bellmen. I was finalizing our next dispatch round, and then a guest came to us. Our desk had no one around, so I can only assume she tried to shortcut her way before everyone else waiting in line at the front desk.
So she goes over to us and goes "I have kind of a stupid question."
So I respond with "No such thing as a stupid question, ma'am! How can we help?"
And she goes "Well, if my phone dies, will my Mobile Key still work?"

ALL OF US AT THE BELLSTAND JUST STOOD THERE, EYES WIDE OPEN. We literally couldn't believe what we just heard. THAT was a stupid question. So we all looked at each other, as if telepathically asking each other "Who's gonna tell her?"
I raised my hand and started off with "Ma'am..."
Then my Bellstaff were looking scared like "Don't you dare say it, Xeno!"
For context, I'm an asshole. A VERY smug asshole. I know places of employment say we can't make the guest/client/customer feel bad or stupid, but when they walk into spotlight, it's fair game.
Anyways, after a small pause, I continue and say "...I want you to repeat that question. But this time, ask it VERY slowy."

She got mad, and rolled her eyes. Then she said "Ugh, I get it!" and then headed to the floor below, presumably to get some food at the restaurant at that floor. Afterward, we all went to the Bellstaff closet where we store and hold any luggage for guests to take out at any time. We laughed it off for a while, and then I helped myself to two Vibe drinks (My favorite convenience store alcoholic drink, 12% alcohol in a medium sized bottle so it'll really get you buzzed if not trashed after downing just one bottle) because I never thought a guest would ask the most stupid question I've ever heard in my resort working life. Mind you, I've worked resorts for 10 years now. And I've done it all from front desk to housekeeping, bartending, bellstaff, activites coordination, valet, and entertainment.